The Lemon Cat Shop Blog: is love over rated?

Sense and sensibility – is love over rated?

Today I was reading email messages from my beloved younger sister. Normal catching up news and chit-chat, but an on-going subject we have been talking about reminds me of the film sense and sensibility.

Sense and sensibility is a book written by Jane Austen using he pseudonym (The Lady), and adapted for film by Emma Thompson (she also stars as Ellinor in the film) and directed by Ang Lee (yes, he is a Chinese film-maker, directing and English period piece). I shall base all my references of the story on the film version, which I have seen quite a lot of times.

In the story, there are 2 sisters, Ellinor and Marianne Dashwood, both looking at imminent spinster-hood, as at that time in England, going into your twenties, still unengaged or without promising suitors is disastrous. Ellinor falls for Edward, but she finds out he is already engaged to Lucy. Edward does not break off the engagement, even though it was a commitment brought about by an impulsive act. He does imply his deep feeling for Ellinor. Marianne on other hand meets the dashing Willoughby, and from the on set, he leads her to believe he has feelings for her. Marianne also has the admirations of Col. Brandon, a man twice her age. The story follows the experiences of the 2 sisters as they deal with upheavals and awkward situations.

I would like to focus on the part of the story of Marianne, the younger sister. As I have mentioned, she met the handsome Willoughby and got enamoured by him. Well, who wouldn’t? But eventually the story unfolds and reveals that he is a libertine, and then leaves Marianne without word whatsoever of their “assumed” relationship. Finally, after pursuing him with letters, Marianne finds out, from attending a party that Willoughby is now with the wealthy, Ms. Grey. In due course, Marianne finds out that, Willoughby through his actions, finds himself under threat of not being supported by his sponsor, his old aunt, and by this fear of being impoverished, sacrifices whatever feelings he harbours for Marianne and gets engaged to Ms. Grey instead.

Marianne is inconsolable. Nearly kills herself by walking out in the rain and becoming deathly ill. But who takes her home? Who picks her up in the rain and carries her back?... Brandon.
So what happens?

Ellinor marries Edward after Edward’s fiancée, Lucy marries his now richer, younger brother Robert. Marianne after courtship from Brandon, decides to marry him, and does realize she loves him. Maybe not the passionate love she felt initially for Willoughby but a deep, lasting love you feel for someone who you know will never leave, never cheat and never lie.

So IS LOVE OVER-RATED?

Love has so many descriptions, meanings, assumptions. With love, here, I mean the love between 2 adults. So is it really just an elusive dream?

There are probably 3 kinds of people out there.

- people who know what they want, who they want, and follow their heart- people who know what they want , who they want, BUT their heart is the least of their priorities- people who don’t know what they want, or who they want (yet) The 3rd category of people would just say to you “I don’t know”. Of course they don’t know… they don’t even know what they want in the first place so how the hell would they know if love is over-rated. The 2nd category of people would I would think absolutely confirm that love IS over-rated. It’s sad because, these sorts of people, like Willoughby, think they will find happiness by pursuing, money or ambition. In the end people like Willoughby, end up with someone they eventually dislike, if not hate, or they end up bitter, cynical and worst alone. A lot of people these days, think “oh if I make enough money I will be happy”. Really? Since when can money buy happiness? Yeah yeah, money can get you unimaginable things but how do you know what people think of you when you don’t have the dosh to keep your entourage? Some people think, oh I want to be with someone made and has status, yeah right… more yadah yadah… in the end when the going gets tough, they will end up yearning for a person who will stand by them no matter what.

So, brings me to people who follow their heart. Doest mean they are senseless people who just act on emotions, I think it’s quite the opposite. They see sense where others can’t think and they see sensibility where others can’t feel. Maybe I am biased as I see myself this way, but I have no time to waste on people who can’t make up their mind then complain how miserable their life is.

LOVE is definitely NOT OVER-RATED.

Love is worth fighting for, living for, dying for. Without it you dont have anything… nothing. Everyday you have it, everything seems just a lot better. You are one of the lucky ones if you know WHO you want. A lot of people walk this earth not knowing who they are meant to be with, how sad. And if you don’t know who you want yet then at least you know what you want, a love, that lasts and will be with you for always.

They do not love that do not show their love. The course of true love never did run smooth. Love is a familiar. Love is a devil. There is no evil angel but Love. William Shakespeare